I often refer to myself as drowning.. on the bad days it's the one thing that describes how I feel. Of course I have never actually drowned but I can only imagine...
Parenting for me often feels like drowning. I am not saying I am a bad mom or looking for validation in that department.. I am a firm believer that we all do our best with what we have and I know that I love my kids and they love me... but parenting and learning how to raise good kids is overwhelming for me. I find it hard to discipline, especially the follow through part. I would rather the whining just stop and often find myself doing whatever it takes to make that part happen. I gave it some good thought yesterday as to why I feel defeated by almost 4 year olds. I think it's because often I feel I have already failed and it's too late.. I have let it go for so long and they have developed bad habits so I kind of feel stuck.
Spring break was harder than I thought.. we fought alot. We had many many time outs and we cried some too (mostly me).
At the end of the day when I tuck my little ones into bed and we pray for a good sleep and we are thankful that we get another day to start again.. I am reminded of grace and how much they have for me... There is a line in a song that I love that says "If Grace were an ocean we'd all be sinking." It's going to be my new mantra... instead of looking at things like I'm drowning I need to be reminded of that.