Sunday, April 29, 2007

goodbye and WELL DONE

its been three days since i breastfed. saying goodbye was easy and hard all at the same time. hard because its a little sad to not have that special time with boys. but easier knowing that i did it! i breastfed twins for 11 months! i am proud of myself and the boys for sticking it in there so long.i came across this drawer the other day in my kitchen and it took me back to the days in the NICU where for 6 weeks I pumped every three hours religiously. I filled jars and jars of milk. Eventually the NICU asked me to stop bringing it and I began to fill my moms freezer. When we left the NICU last June they had a nurses aid help us carry (on a cart) my two huge boxes of frozen milk into a cooler that filled the entire trunk. I am proud of myself for carrying on as it was not easy in the beginning. I am done now and although I will miss it I am stinking happy we did it!
My last nurse with each was special. i told them how lucky i felt to be their mom and as i looked down at them they each looked up at me with a twinkle in their eye and bit me.. ahh it was finished.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

my thoughts too..

Eva wrote a great post here about the pros and cons of being a twin. Just whats been on my mind lately. I have always struggled in this aspect since the boys were born. Torn between not having enough arms or not being able to cuddle them seperatly. Lately its been at not being able to spend one on one time with them. The other night we were with friends and Noah was contently sitting on Rhonda's lap as she read stories to him. He loved it. It made me sad that I don't get to do that as often.. having two babies wiggling on your lap and fighting over who gets to chew the pages is not as peaceful as that. I love when one wakes up slightly earlier than the other and I get the chance for individual cuddles. I am encouraged that my kids will know how much I love them and when I don't have quite enough arms to hold them or enough one on one attention to give them. They do have each other and that is a beautiful thing...

Monday, April 23, 2007

divide & conquer

divide & conquer was the name of the game on Saturday when Dave and i went in to Winnipeg to catch the sale that our multiples club has twice a year. this is not your average sale. this is an arena filled with kids stuff. you name it they have it. i think i counted 23 high chairs alone.. the members of our club can sell stuff and members get first dibs and then its open to the public. we got there to stand in a line of about 200 which all got in quick and because of the size of the arena this did not feel crowded at all. we had been checking out the merchandise as we made our way along the outside of the glass.. i went for the clothes, shoes and small stuff while Dave headed for toys.. it was quite the site to see him pulling our red wagon through the isles and me with my huge Rubbermaid tub. again a little disappointed in the clothes area as its always so much girl stuff. i did manage to get some good stuff. when Dave and i met up i was pleasantly surprised at his achievements. i had warned him that the sale required you to be ruthless. don't give things a second thought as someone will come and swoop it away. the policy was throw it in the wagon think about it later. he had so much stuff.. and good stuff. we sat down in a corner to go through our stuff and decide what we wanted and what we would put back (people come around and clean up your unwanted stuff really quick) this sale is no joke!
at the end we had some great outside as well as inside toys, books, a couple videos, clothes and some other odds and ends. as we were sitting down to go through our stuff i finally took a second to look up and the line of "others" (ha ha that was our joke - i meant the public) the line was so long and as they started to let people in the arena got so crowded. there were probably upwards of 600 people in there. it was mayhem! we got in line quickly and paid and out the door as the line kept growing and growing.
it was a good time. i am so thankful the club does something like this. its so great to be able to know that twice a year there will be a good sale like this. the boys are loving there new toys.
so till next fall, thank you Manitoba Family of Multiples for another great day!

Wednesday, April 18, 2007


two posts in one day! i wanted to blog about yesterday.. i felt inspired. there were a few times over the course of my day i was hit with feelings of hope and inspiration. i felt accomplishment and encouragement. i got to go to stay and play at my church which is always fun. its nice to be with other moms and interesting to watch my kids watch other kids and have new toys to play with. things like that help me stay in the game.. being a sahm is hard and some days feels so lonely.. i got to meet a fellow blogging mom Stacey whose blog i read but had never met. that was so nice. got out walking with the boys in the sunshine. yes finally we have sunshine. something about being outside that brings life. to me and the boys.
in the evening i attended a class at My Scrap Shoppe that I have been looking forward to for weeks. We altered a 16x20 canvas. Mine looked like this: (if you click on it you can see it bigger)I was pretty happy with it. I had such a great time. Felt so inspired and enjoyed spending time with the people there. I met another blogging mom Eva whose site I have lurked on for awhile. It was such a great evening. Can't remember one better in a long time! They really encouraged me in my creativity and to stop being so insecure and even convinced me to sign up for Super Scrap Day next weekend. It was a big step in the right direction as I remember to stop telling myself lies and to just be..... creatively ME!

must haves....

yesterday i wanted to blog badly and never got around to it and today i have at least three posts rattling around in my head so i will start with giving you my must have items that i use daily...

i love all things lotions, soaps, scrubs, etc... but two of my must haves leave me missing Vancouver.

The amazing uber talented Wade Pallister: friend, encourager, protector, advice giver, ultimate chef, best coffee maker, soap master and his family created Jah Jirah Soapworks Our household trys to never be without two of his amazing soaps.. First Sophie’s Sensitive Soother Soap which was created when their first child Sophia was born.. His products are all natural and made from the best ingredients. We've never had any diaper rash or anything and its great for smooth, soft, babies skin. The second which Dave is panicking at the thought of running out is Undercover Grubber Scrubber/Sleek & Sporty All-Purpose Miracle Soap. This soap is Dave's must have.. he uses it for everything. Soap, shampoo, and its great for getting out tough stains. Dave says its all about the tea tree oil. Check out the other varieties that they have. We have used them all... can't rave enough about it. Thank you Pallisters.

My second must have is from Escents its a close second fave in my shower. Its their
Rejuvenating Salt Scrub and it has yummy bergamot and grapefruit. Its the best skin polisher and leaves your skin feeling amazing. Sadly no Escents in my future and as my container slowly runs out it puts a smile on my face as I remember Commercial Drive.

So thanks Vancouver.. for friends, good food and the best skin care I have ever known.

Monday, April 16, 2007

its only 10:30am...

overheard at our house this morning
"hey don't spit up on your brothers face."
"no ari stop that is can't pick up noah's poop"
"noah get your hands out of the garbage bin"
this could be a long day....

Sunday, April 15, 2007

under construction...

our life voyage is getting a facelift! thanks to my incredible friend jamie who is doing it all for me for which i am in awe and so thankful. finding time to work on it was creating a problem and i was just too frusterated with the html stuff to move on.. so stay tuned as she tweeks and creates for me. and the comments have moved to the top of the post - so you still need to comment... let us know what you think...

Saturday, April 14, 2007

life is not fair...

A fellow blogger of twins Snickollet lost her husband to cancer yesterday. Her twins are 9 months old. Emmie at Better Make It a Double has created a virtual candle to honor them. Snickollet writes beautifully of her love for him "I'm so sad on so many levels. I'm sad for GH, myself, and the twins for all the things we won't get to do as a foursome. I'm sad for the world at large for the loss of an incredible man. But he doesn't have cancer anymore. He's not sick anymore. And while the end came so incredibly quickly, we had said what needed to be said and he knew how intensely I loved him, which is the most important thing."
So as Emmie put it "
None of us can do a whole lot for her, but we can send her some love. Tonight, I will light a candle for Snickollet and her family. Maybe you can too*, and maybe go over and tell her."

Friday, April 13, 2007

who the heck are you?

10 1/2 months old stats:
Heavyweight: Noah 19lbs 2oz. 27 1/2"
Lightweight: Ari 18lbs 6.5oz. 26 5/8"

went to the city yesterday for an appointment with our pediatrician to see if he could shed some light on the boys condition.. he ordered a blood test to test for allergies and with only a few minutes to think about the fact that the boys were going to have their very first needle (other than when they were weeks old in the NICU) I would have to say it went well. I was not looking forward to it and when they were pricked (on their finger) they didn't even complain. They got upset as the tech had to squeeze three vials of blood out of their little chubby finger. not nice. I was so impressed by how calm they were and with no meltdowns we were out of there. Now to those of you with multiples you know that going out is not an easy task.. It takes much planning and by the end of the day I was exhausted. Physically, Mentally and Emotionally. My good friend came along to help me as I would have never made it all around the city without someone.
i know some of you have posted your experiences of what its like to take out multiples and the instant rock star status you get. it adds to the exhaustion of the day. answering a million questions and smiling at strangers more than you ever thought possible and the comments... i will give you an overview of the things i heard and overheard while pushing my double stroller through the mall...
-There was the usual "awe cute" "ooh twins" "wow" - which i am totally fine with. I love people who think my kids are cute and even though the novelty of it is probably that there is two if fine with me too.
-I hear the "double trouble" one alot. This one gets to me after a while. Who are you to say that my kids must be trouble. I find myself doubly blessed with the two of them. Its hard work but I don't come up to you and assume your kids are trouble.
-"Are they natural" "Did you use drugs to get them" - Who are you? Why strangers feel the need to ask me these questions is beyond me because its really no ones business. And the whole natural comment is just plain stupid.
-I don't mind the "You must have your hands full" seems kind of obvious...but whatever.
-Some lady told me she always wanted twins but her husband said no.. maybe she knows something the rest of us don't?
-I'm not a big fan of complete strangers thinking its ok to touch them.. do people go up to moms with one baby and put there dirty hands all over them.
-One dad said yesterday while we were changing diapers in the family room at the mall.. "I bet you can't wait till they are older. this must be a horrible stage." what? who are you? this one had me staring blankly at him with no good response.
-to the grandma that stopped me to stare at my boys and stand directly in front of the stroller when they were having an obvious all out meltdown.. MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!
and my all time fave from yesterday. mom and daughter walk by my very adorable well behaved kids and the mom turns to the daughter. "Oh look twins. Can you believe that? Ugg that is something I would NEVER want" ok lady.

after posting this realized that the twinkies post today is on the same subject.. go over there for similar and more stories of what not to do when approaching multiples in public (or not so public) places.

please don't misread the above. i don't mind people stopping me to tell me how cute they are and i love to answer peoples intelligent questions.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Monday, April 09, 2007

for sale

twin boys. 10 months old. as is. make me an offer.

ever just have one of those days?

Sunday, April 08, 2007

teeth are mean...

poor little guys.. having to grow teeth sure must be painful. add that on top of all the sickness and we have babies who are a little unhappier than usual. although i must admit they are handling it better than i would have thought. teething is a stage that is mean to all mother but mostly those of us with more than one.. hard to hold and comfort two who want your undivided attention.
the sickness continues on.. thanks to those of you who posted your thoughts. i too think allergies must be the culprit and i am pretty much over the idea that medicine can or will help.. i have made an appointment with the naturopathic doctor here in town as i have heard only good things about her. maybe she can shed some light onto our situation. we are getting our carpets cleaned and i have been freezing and drying their stuffed toys to get rid of dust mites. and although the boys are traumatized by the vacuum i do that too.
other than all that it has been a pretty good week. nice that it was short with the long weekend and all. having dave around is always so nice for me. he loves spending time with the boys and is just the best dad. last weekend i was away for the day and dave and the boys had a great time - their toy of choice the big boxes there big carseats came in. all day my three boys played in here..I'll leave you with these pics of my little boys growing up so fast... I think they are a little unsure of their new carseats but in just over a month we can turn them around and I think they will really like that.... Can't believe they were this small. Oh and speaking of small - please send out good thoughts for some family friends who at 30 weeks just had twin boys just under 3lbs. They are in Vancouver in the Neo-Natal Unit. All good thoughts to them as they are quite traumatized at there much to early birth. Ari & Noah on June 14, 2006 - Discharged from hospital at just barely 5lbs.
Ari & Noah on March 31, 2006 - Discharged from infant seats to big boy seats - 19lbsTesting out the new big boy seats.

Monday, April 02, 2007

sweet surrender

This article is my submission to the blog challenge sponsored by Art Bookbindery, "Empowering Writers to Self Publish."

Original post: August 2005 - My Perspective as a Doula on Eva's Birth.
Reverance... The wisdom, power, glory, and unadulterated love contained in childbirth absolutely bring's me to my knees. I am struck by a new phrase, insight, or revelation that expands my knowledge about birth, and my awe for the strength, endurance and brilliance of birthing women.
This rings true of this birth story…your birth story was as beautiful as it gets.
I met your mom about a month before you were born. She is beautiful and her heart is so good. She was sweet and soft spoken as she shared with me the feelings of the unknown as she prepared for your arrival. We watched a video the first time we met which showed different families and their birth stories. I liked your mom so much especially when I saw we cried in the same parts and I loved the way she rubbed her belly as she watched these other women bring life to their babies. I was excited to be apart of your arrival.

It was Friday July 29; I sprung out of bed at the sound of my pager going off. Excitement runs through my body as hearing my pager in the middle of the night is still a new experience. I spoke with your mom on the phone; she told me that she woke up at 4am feeling the contractions starting. They were still about 10 minutes apart. She told me they felt best when she was sitting on the toilet and I had heard that before. I asked her to time them for another half hour and see what happened. I also told her to eat a good meal as this next part might take awhile and once in the hospital she may not eat again. I spoke with your dad and made sure he was making her drink lots of water and pee lots too. I hung up the phone with the promise that they would call me again in a half hour. I didn’t feel much like sleeping anymore but went to lie down.

The phone rang again at about 5am and I could tell from your mom’s voice that the contractions were stronger at one point she even put the phone down and I could hear her focusing on what she was feeling. The power of a women’s body is incredible, I was already so proud of her.
We decided it was time to meet at the hospital. I got ready and remember walking out the door just as a cool breeze hit my face. The sun was beginning to shine warmly and I remember that there was a Celine Dion song playing on the radio as I drove through the pretty quiet streets. I got to the hospital and found your mom and dad in an assessment room. The nurse had just put on a monitor to hear your heartbeat. It was strong and loud. I then heard that your mom had worked so hard she was already dilated to 5cm. Your dad was funny and was cracking lots of jokes; the mood was light and pleasant. It wasn’t long and we met our nurse Susan who came to tell us they had a room ready for us. We walked slowly over. Your mom was so strong she had contractions and you could see she would focus all her strength and energy to them. Once in the room where we would meet you your mom got into the shower which was a nice relief. They had a stool and she sat while I let the shower head massage her back. We had problems adjusting the water temperature but finally we would get it perfect. Your mom handled contractions well in the shower. I remember the biggest change being when she would relax and let them flow over her. We sat in a lot of silence; birth is such an intimate event that requires so much reverence.

After about an hour your mom got tired and we moved to the bed where lying on her side worked the best. It was hard to lie down but we continued to focus during the contractions. The Dr. came in to see us and remarked that progress was being made and your mom was doing so well. We spent this time just resting between contractions and focusing on releasing the tension when one would come. Your mom was so strong, she passed on pain medication when it was offered and we were in tune with each other and remembering that her body was designed to have you and she was doing it. It was good to remember to focus on one contraction at a time. This was the transition phase and your mom wasn’t getting much of a break. Her uterus was working really hard to bring you into this world. At about 9am the nurse checked and her cervix had dilated to 7cm. We were all surprised at how fast your mom was progressing. She was doing everything right and you were coming quickly. Things were intense and your mom chanted “I can I can I can” over and over and I know this positive thinking was helping you come down and get ready to show us your pretty face. At 9:30 the doctor broke the bag of waters and with a gush things moved very fast. Your mom’s cervix was 10cm by now and it was time to push. We were at the finish line. Your mom did so well and was so strong during this hard time. She pushed only three times and you were born. You came so quickly and with one smooth movement you were on your mom’s tummy. It was a miracle. I had to remember to breathe as I took in all the strength that your birth created. In me as tears flowed down my cheeks. In your dad as his eyes were wide open as he watched you come out, as he wiped his tears and cut the cord. Watching your mom was what hit me the most, she looked so beautiful and I knew that she had set her mind to take each moment as it came. She did it! She was radiant as she looked at you and checked you over. You were so beautiful. Your birth day started at 9:59am on July 29th, 2005.

So there it is your story. Remember your strength as a woman, I am sure your mom will teach you many wonderful things and I hope as you read this you will remember the strength she showed as she willed her body to bring you into this world. Her love and her strength and her belief in her body’s process won in the end. Here is to life, love and lots of happiness.

Sunday, April 01, 2007


all things new:
we have a tooth. ari wins
we have big car seats
noah gets and actually does the sign for eat
our new favorite toy is the box the car seat came in
yesterday the boys spent a whole day with daddy alone. they all did great

things not new:
the infamous cough is getting worse. not sure if i posted this but the doctor has them on inhalers for restricted airways and for awhile i thought it might be helping but the coughing fits are getting more and more intense.. really wondering if there is some sort of allergy.. cough, cough, sneeze, cough cough, sneeze - usually going on for about 5 minutes at a time. mostly at night and in the morning. any thoughts?