Friday, August 18, 2006

a mothers voyage..


as the title of this blog i have been pondering what it means to voyage. Voyage: meaning to uncover the events of a journey with exploration and discovery. this is what life is about right? well being a mother is definitly a voyage and journey; filled with ups and downs and more downs some days. there are often thoughts of wondering if i am capable of raising these boys in light and love as much as they need. some days i feel as if i have nothing to offer them... my frustration gets the best of me and in most circumstances i just hold on. i guess thats what alot of life is about.. just holding on. i also have been journeying through my own expectations that i placed on myself as i became a mother. so many things i have had to lay down and some things i thought i would never pick up i have had too. but in this journey of self discovery i guess i am learning that perfection is not the aim... if thats my aim i will always fail. my boys love me for what i give them; they love me!
if i keep aiming for perfection i will always let myself down. i must journey to discover what is best for us and not worry about everything else that doesn't get picked up along the way..
so in this journey of self discovery here are at the moment some of my favorite things...
1. sharpie markers - i love sharpies not the big fat ones but the fine point ones. great for writing in cards and sending loving thoughts to those i miss.
2. paper - pretty paper. i love to go to scrapbook stores and find great paper.
3. coffee - yummy - i love good coffee. i miss that about vancouver. coffee also makes me miss audrey cause she loves good coffee too.
4. along with coffee i love my big starbucks mugs. one from vancouver and one from seattle. every morning i love to sit with my boys and enjoy a big mug of good coffee.
5. avacados - these are a recent passion of mine. did you know they are good in almost any form. but especially in this mexican salad that Crystal introduced me too. as Racheal Ray would say YUM-O!
6. Chantal Kreviazuk - really looking forward to her new cd coming out on august 29th. i love honest acoustic music where you can tell the song writer means what she writes. not too mention she is beautiful and i want her hair colour.
7. stain remover - when you have poop up the back at least once a day its a miracle for baby clothes.
8. Carter's clothes - thanks to Carly i have the cutest clothes around. you can wash and wash them and they look the same as the day you bought them. now thats good quality.

thats it for now...i'd love to hear how you are discovering yourself and what you love and how that fits in your life.. i hope to write more on my self discovery especially as i venture into motherhood. love to you all.

6 comments:

j. oates said...

thanks for the honesty and heart in this blog. it means alot to me. i love you more and more the more i get to know you. i hope to hear more of your self-discovery as you become a mum and hope to share mine with you as well.....hope this little boy comes soon...

Anonymous said...

Right now I am loving being pregnant, and feeling beautiful every day. I've always thought pregnant women were beautiful, and I am very much enjoying being one of them! I find it very sweet the way some of the older "grandpas" in my church always have to come and hug me!

lagiulia said...

Raising any baby is hard, but twins... that's a tall order. Yes, also a huge blessing, but very challenging some days. One of you, two of them. Yikes. We are all learning what some of our strengths and weaknesses are, and hopefully we can bask in the beauty of the strengths and not be too judgemental with the weakness. Lots of love to you and those cuties.

The Pauls' Family said...

I love....
~A husband who loves me in spite of my weaknesses.
~Children who are so forgiving and give great hugs.
~The creativity of God so evident in nature, especially flowers with all their beautiful shapes and colors.
~The beauty and tranquility of a star filled night.
~The love of God which is higher and deeper and longer and wider than anything I could ever imagine.
~The special privelage that I have to be a mom.

Crystal said...

Thin sharpies make me happy too:)

Lisa said...

Heather, it's been so awesome to see you come into motherhood. It's a tough journey sometimes - i know that too. But isn't it so worth it? Children are kinda like a clean slate just waiting to be written on. It's a little overwhelming, hey? I think you are doing so so well. I love you and you're right; your boys do too.