Keep calm because this is the moment. - Jekyll and Hyde
I saw that the other day and it is fitting for right now. today. here.
I feel a lump in my throat tonight as I sit here and try to get some work done.. the only thing I can think of as my heart starts to race is that I have 4 days of work left. 6.5 years. I remember standing at the window when I answered the phone when we lived on Duster Bay being offered this job. I had two not even 2 year olds and this job literally saved our lives. The benefit of working half days was a gift.. being able to get out of the house for part of the day but also be home worked perfect for us. I also entered a job I literally fell in love with.
It's the best blend. Outgoing by nature I have loved my front line work. Being surrounded by amazing co-workers makes going to work easy. So many things I could say about my job. One thing is for sure.. I will miss it. Terribly. Thinking about the people I get to work with every day is what is causing this lump in my throat.. I know they will all be ok without me but I will miss their everyday presence in my life. From my corner coffee break table, to the hall behind me and the two people who occupy those spaces and make me thankful to sit where I sit. To the one I share my space with... and my heart.
I know I made the right choice and am following my heart and my passion.. I am so blessed to be able to work from home and be more available to my family and the new circle that welcomes me.. but part of my heart is broken into a million pieces because as crazy as it may seem to you my life at 675 Prairie View Drive changed the course of our home.. made a struggling mama to twins survive those first few years.. it wasn't only the work place but the nurturing loving hands who held, read stories to, sang songs with, played endless rounds of duck duck goose, who fed, cleaned up after, prayed for and LOVED my boys.. it was a village. My village.
Change is scary, but like my Dad said to me "Take risks... what's the worst that can happen?" I think I have found who I am meant to be over the past 6.5 years.. my village, my people they have all helped me get here.
So for the next 4 days I plan to relish each moment. To take it all in. Cause really I have SO much to be thankful for.. so much to look forward to. So much life to live. What are we without our village?
So this week.. I will send my boys down the driveway on their bikes to school, pack up Jett and my morning smoothie. We will turn on the Eagle and listen to Chuck. I will get coffee and get Jett a blueberry muffin. I'll drop him off at Shirlies and drive to work. I'll park in spot #6. And just like now.. I'll probably cry.
I have so much to be thankful for. My heart is full. And a tiny bit broken. Grateful for so much.