three going on five

three years. seems hard to comprehend. Jett Anderson today you are three. You came into this world early and much to our surprise. Seems like you are keeping with the trend.. early to do everything and always keeping us on our toes.

At three I feel like you have made your presence known... Jetty Boy (as Daddy and your brothers call you) You are expressive and animated. Funny in every way. Your communication skills and memory surprise me everyday.. You are silly and quirky and unafraid. You take big risks. You are passionate. Stubborn too. Each day you say things that I wish I had written down.

You love to be outside.. You wake up asking to be outside. All boy. All in. All the time.

Being your mama is a blessing. And although these days are tough as we figure each other out I am in awe of how smart, compassionate and loving you are. When you wrap your little arms around my neck and say "Mommy I just love you so much" I melt. Your wet kisses are always welcome. When I am having a rough day or things are just not working between you and me you easily come sit in my lap and we work it out. I feel sentimental with you.. maybe cause you are the last baby I'll have... maybe cause it's so often just you and me. I don't know... I have been thinking so much about how you came into the world... Early and in the midst of chaos. I sat down tonight and read through the journal I kept while at the hospital the days leading up to your birth and then the detailed description of how I felt that day... This week has been rough for other reasons and today as I sit here and reflect on your birthday I feel immense peace and grace for the gift you are in our lives.. it's not always easy to be a mom for me and somedays I just ache for bedtime but every smile, word, giggle and new discovery reminds me that I am in the right place. For memory sake the time leading up to your birth is significant for me... a little walk down memory lane...

There is a feeling when you have a c-section.. so aware of whats going on yet so behind the curtain. I remember this moment so clearly.. makes my stomach lurch a bit.. this was my best ugly cry... such grief and relief weaved into one sacred moment.

Currently your relationship with these two is varied from day to day.. somedays good somedays bad and somedays just not relevant... but you all love each other that I know and I can't wait to see the relationships you will develop with your older brothers...

I love you Jett I can't imagine another boy as special, funny and clever as you. You have my heart .. all of it. All the time.

Happy Birthday Jett.

Shine on baby. Welcome to three.