a couple giveaways...

two great giveaways to share about. Stacey is graciously giving away a super cute Amy May Nursing Bracelet. I love this idea!! Not sure how it would have worked with twins (i guess i would have needed two) but i do know that having something like this would be amazing! it makes so much sense while being stylish too. Thanks Stacey and Amy May. Go check out Amy May's Etsy Store she has beautiful Mei Tai's and gorgeous Burp cloth sets.
Drea is also giving away a Gauze Wrap from Hug A Bug Baby They carry affordable Wraps and Mei Tais. This Gauze wrap looks great as its breathable with the ease of a wrap. Great giveways guys.

pit in stomach..

hoping you didn't miss Yesterdays Oprah.. Jenny Mcarthy and Holly Robinson Peete were on and shared their experiences of having sons with autism. this show had made an impact on me and thankfully i have it on tape... just a few moments of that pit in your stomach that seems to be much more real now that i am a mom. the way Jenny spoke of her son's seizures and his sudden vacancy in his eyes. really powerful. of course vaccines were called out and I was so glad Jenny shared how she felt about the whole thing. Steph over at Adventures in Babywearing has some powerful resources regarding the whole thing. With personal experience I find she writes honestly from the heart and in doing so brings non judgmental information. Thanks Steph!
As a non vaccinating mommy (in a place where this is almost unheard of) you fight that inner struggle daily. Just wanting to do whats best for your kids. Regardless of the vaccine argument we must begin to find our mommy voices and educate and discuss the issues that lay close to your heart. remember you know your kids and you have their best interests at heart. no one can come close to that. go with your gut.

pure joy

practically speaking

well its monday again. seems the weekends go by so quickly. especially since i worked twice this weekend. not really my idea of fun. seems i don't get enough time with my family that way. but dave loves having one on one time or i guess one on two time with the boys.
my to do list this week is a LONG one. and practically speaking i am unsure of how to go about it. it seems almost impossible to get things done with two little ones running around and getting into everything. our basement needs desperate help as we have been organizing and packing things away to make the showing of our house a better one. we have a lot of junk! so purging feels good. it sometimes seems so endless though. it feels like i move things from one pile to another one. ugg. anyways yes good news we are going to put up our house for sale and we are working out the details and are hoping to start building our new house soon!!! i will have more details this week and will post about it soon.. just feeling like we have been given a gift and that my house was important to God after all... lovely!

tagged

Ok so I was tagged by Stacey for this little game.

Post these rules before you give the facts. You must list one fact that is somehow relevant to your life for each letter of your middle name. (If you don't have a middle name, use the middle name you would have liked to have had.) When you are tagged you need to write your own blog-post and then choose one person for each letter of your middle name to tag. Don't' forget to leave them a comment telling them they're tagged, and to read your blog.

M - Multiples. I could not for the life of me come up with an M word. I have multiples. I am constantly surprised at the things people think they can say to me because I have multiples. Honestly it has taken me a long time to come to appreciate this fact. I often feel like we are a little freak show. Ahh but at least its MY freak show.

A - Artistic. I love to let my creative juices flow in a an artistic way. I love to see a project from start to finish. Being artsy brings me LIFE.

R - Routine. I am a big fan of routine in my life. Its not really a serious problem just something that makes me feel more peaceful about life. I admit I have a hard time when things change last minute. My morning routine is by far the most dear to me. Coffee, Toast with peanut butter and the opening segment of Live with Regis & Kelly

I - Indecisive. I must admit I am fairly indecisive. It seems more so since I have had kids. I mull decisions over and over and most of the time just wish someone would make them for me. I wish I could be more confident in my own decision making skills.

E - Everywhere. Since I worked with YWAM I have moved around alot and with that comes the fact that I have friends everywhere. I am sad that I miss out on so many peoples lives because we are all so spread out. I am thankful for those here in my life but miss those that live everywhere else.

Now I tag Lisa, Eva, Marcy, Audrey & Lindsey

where did my little babies go?

I have been sitting here all day looking at these little boys who look so grown up wondering where my babies went... They had a haircut today. Just off the sides which were really starting to make them look like a clown.. Its true though after that first haircut they just somehow look older. But so sweet...

new day

i have a new outlook on life today.. just a different perspective. slept real good last night. it was kind of wierd. noah woke up only once and that was before midnight... ari slept till 8 without waking up for milk at 6 which was strange... i feel rested. i had a great day yesterday with my first phone session with kim mcmechan (read posts below) she spoke deep to my soul. i will blog more about that later. i feel a bit like a new person. ready to move forward. havn't moved forward in a long time.
thanks for all your comments below. they were encouraging. thanks for being out there.

tired

i am tired. physically and emotionally tired. after almost 16 months i still am getting up at night to tend to one kid or another (never at the same time). noah has resorted to being up almost every 2 hours... yes i know teething could be the culprit. but it doesn't make it any less tiring. i hate getting up at night.. am beginning to resent it in fact. its taking a toll on me in almost every way including my marriage. some how night time parenting is the worst for dave and i. we seem to miss the mark in communicating every time. not sure how much more we can take. any suggestions.. (please remember there is two to take into consideration so not all tried methods will apply)

babywearing..

I've mentioned how big of a fan of babywearing i am in the past. And although with twins my babywearing has been somewhat restricted. i really valued being able to wear them when they were little and still do a bit here and there. Musings of a Crunchy Domestic Goddess is having a contest! She reviewed this great DVD which I think would make a great addittion to my Doula Library as well as a great resource for me and other babywearing moms around here. (not sure if there is many but i know at least a couple). Tummy 2 Tummy DVD looks great!

practical..

I am always looking for new ways to practically get around with twins.. there is always the stroller but some days when you just want to run in somewhere its a pain and it also depends on where you can fit and maneuver. then there is the grocery store. ahh the pain of single carts. superstore is the only place where i can manage smoothly taking both boys because of there great double seat in the cart. but some days i just long to get to co-op and pick up a few things and that is where i buy my new bothwell cheese. I own an Ergo carrier which is fabulous but i have not yet mastered getting my kids on my back (at least not smoothly and certainly not in a parking lot). So even though Steph's Mr Linky hates me here I am entering yet again another contest. Rockin' Baby is giving away one of their beautiful "strawberry fields forever" sling. heres to hoping.

tripping into daylight

what a beautiful description of my life right now. i can't take credit for the title though. it comes from a book that has deeply moved and inspired me lately. i have wrote of kim mcmechan before and the way her voice stirs my soul. recently i was honored to receive her book as a gift and its already quite "used". i have read and reread it over and over. she writes short stories, poems and reflections... its so relatable. there is one page that has been read the most.. its a page that has become my go to.. someone that understands me.. like she is in my head and those are my thoughts put onto paper...
"sometimes there's nothing inside you but echoes, and the water is so low, its left a line, a watermark that's cracking in the sun and you feel it may never rise, fear you will be left out way up high to dry, never to float weightless again. Sometimes all the words have gone up and flown away, leaving no trace but a fayed string or a broken piece of kits flapping wildly in the wind to remind you there was once something there but it got so broken and its too far gone you'll never find it. Sometimes you are an elm tree in winter, bare and black and frozen, just tangled lines reaching for the sky and all you can do is try to cast shadows and make silhouettes in the blue morning, bare and cold. Inside me is January. Inside me is a backyard full of old snow. Inside me is a long stretch of prairie road. I am wiling like the the plants on the windowsill. Inside me is a place where the sun won't reach. Inside me is a white walled room with no pictures or windows or chairs. Sometimes there's nothing to say, you just a need a summer's day to warm your skin, to make something right again."
shes launched a new site of course brilliant idea and i am excited to have a coaching session with her next week.Her website is called Luscious Living (I can get the link to work for some strange reason so go to www.livelusciously.com.) She desires as a life coach to coach busy women (espcially mothers) who long for more order, balance, creativity and joy in their lives. Perfect! Her new site has lots to offer including a blog. So go check it out.

garbage day

tomorrow is garbage day. i just got home from a walk and saw a family going through the trash at the apartment building on the corner of my bay. it really hit me. i have seen poverty and seen depravity. i have lived in big cities where homelessness is normal. i have been asked for food and for money on the street more times than i can count. i have led outreaches that focus on these issues. but today in my quiet little "perfect" white picket fence pleasant ville type community i saw a little girl putting on someones lipstick that had just come from a trash bag... and i want a bigger house and a pair of $50 kids shoes? now thats perspective. lord help me. help them.

please.....

pretty please i want to win this awesome giveaway from Steph over at Adventures in Babywearing. She is once again partnering with Vincent Shoes (oh so adorable) to give away a $50 gift certificate. Now as a mom to twins who has to buy things in TWO any kind of gift certificate would do. Not only does Vincent have the cutest footwear but the quality looks amazing. I have been drooling over their new collection which you can view here. I would love to see Ari & Noah walking in style this winter with either a very cute pair of Tom boots. I love Smith, Mini, Max and Dennis too. Go check it out.

loving these guys..

Been enjoying a good long weekend. Love those! This pic was taken last week when the boys along with Daves parents visited Steinbach. Good times. Been creative this weekend diving into some scrapbooking. Check out My Scrapbooking Gallery by hitting the tabs on the top of my page.

this, that & the other

happy thursday! its been full week so far... starting with sunday when dave and i left for our little getaway.. we headed down to grand forks. we stayed at a nice hotel and enjoyed shopping, eating, shopping, hot tubbing, eating, drinking coffee, eating and swimming. of special note was target.. i enjoyed it not only once but twice, eating at red lobster and of course the all time best place Qdoba's Mexican Grill.. seriously just about the best burritos i've had. I enjoyed Starbucks twice and I introduced Dave to Cold Stone creamery. But by far the prize goes to the 45 minutes we spent with all the hotel guests in a hallway waiting out the tornado that ripped through grand forks. it actually landed about 7 miles south and even involved a fatality. we were fine but the light show was one i won't soon forget. we relaxed which was the goal and although i did not sleep through the night it was peaceful and so quiet.
we came back to the boys having colds (dave had one last week) so they have been a bit off but they have enjoyed having grandma and grandpa difrancesco staying with us. tuesday's big adventure led us to Landmark to have our apples pressed - we got 63 2L jugs of goodness. we stopped in steinbach at the mennonite heritage place which was interesting. i remember going when i was little.
yesterday the boys enjoyed the library with grandpa and had great naps.
today i have been playing catch up with laundry, cleaning and stuff. looking forward to scrapping tonight.
i think thats about it.. i will get some pics up soon.

grumpy pants...

thats how i feel... not just today but in general. but aside from that today is a special day and i want to celebrate it for what it is and not let me grumpiness rob me of that celebration. three years ago today i married the best guy! its been a road with lots of bumps and some potholes, sometimes it was straight and sometimes the road was so curvy it was hard to stay on. but i wouldn't want to travel with anyone else. thanks for the memories and thanks for always making me see how many more we have to experience and even in my grumpiness we can find the reason we celebrate occasions such as this one. a little look back...

for tomorow...

just happy that i married you three years ago...

did i say light??

uggg feeling very grumpy this morning... not enough sleep maybe. a few posts down i hinted toward something good in the house hunting department and felt certain that maybe something promising was on the horizon.. yea well forget all that.. rewind to where you didn't know anything was happening cause thats where we are. back at square one or zero. starting over. its disappointing of course but i guess there must be a pot of gold at the end of someones rainbow.. somewhere...

light at the end of a very dark tunnel

as i write this my children are both screaming... lately its all they seem to do. whether both just wanting me or they have hit each other or are not getting what they want. its been a tough week and i am so thankful its friday. thankful dave will be home in 8 hours. thankful my in laws arrive tomorrow for a week. thankful next week i celebrate 3 years being married to the best guy. thankful on sunday we are going away for a night to celebrate with no kids.
being thankful helps.

no strength not even for a title...

thats how i feel today. ari is still crying which is what he has been doing since he woke up this morning... he is suposed to be napping and after putting him down 8 times already this time he is just going to stay there till he falls asleep. today i would just rather not be a parent.... somedays i just want to rewind to 2 1/2 years ago and really enjoy those days. i know i am blessed with my kids and i do love them but today i have no strength to deal with any of it. my house is a mess, i still have not gotten to shower, i know any minute ari will wake up noah with his screaming and then i will be even more mad than i am now.. take me away please take me away.
so i went to check in on ari who in his screaming had pooped his pants.. so i picked him up changed him, gave him some milk and now he is back to screaming in his bed oh and i forgot to say dave just called and said he'd be late tonight... perfect!